violations & silencing

[chronic_ally]

i was going to make this a longer post but i realized that i do not have the energy or the time and i do not want to make myself more vulnerable or drag this on any longer than it already has been. so, in bulletpoints:

 

- every complaint i have about pro-c maps applies just as strongly if not more about liberal anti-c’s and antimaps

- i write from the point of view of a strong defender of nnia, someone who is strongly associated with nnia in the minds of detractors (both pro-c maps and antimaps), who has had to sacrifice a lot to be here; i would probably be dead or much more mentally ill if i had never encountered nnia, and the best people and some of the best theoretical and political advancements i’ve seen are here; my life would be much more awful and bland without it.

- i also write from the point of view of someone who feels that nnia, and anti-c maps in general (especially leftists, especially anarchists) are the primary victims in situations where pro-c maps, or pro-c’s in general, are harassing people for being anti-c. when i talk about negative consequences and suffering i am referring to specific people experiencing negative consequences and suffering and those people are members of nnia and identify with nnia. nnia is experiencing the suffering.

- if you are not a map or significantly involved in the map community you are not fully qualified to handle the nuances involved in political conflicts with pro-c maps/map allies and you should leave the main work to us if you’re not going to be helpful. also check your mapmisia because for a lot of you it comes out once you’re talking about maps you think are properly sacrificeable this time. also in practice that isn’t even what happens much because we get the brunt of the targeting for that even more than pro-c’s do (too unrespectable etc.) my work is mainly for fellow anti-c maps and map supporters who want to understand their struggles they experience as community members, as well as unrelated interested parties who are youth liberationists and seek general youthlib analysis or would benefit from synthesizing that analysis with an insider perspective of the issues of our particular milieus. it is not for mapmisists looking for an axe to grind who seek to co-opt my work for their agendas. those are rightwing tactics and citing my trauma as justification for furthering my trauma is one of the most vile things you can do. stay away from me, don’t fucking touch me.

- the issues i highlight with pro-c map communities are intensified by antimap activism.

- if we have internal contradictions we resolve those on our own, for our own sakes. that is none of your business and we don’t work to meet your standards, nor should we. you are not a part of this, stay out. (your involvement always makes everything worse and is a huge part of why we are here now in the first place.)

- i doubt any of you have faced the same level of violence from pro-c’s that we have, nor will you.

- i’ve seen abusive/exploitative antis be held fully accountable maybe two, three times total. i’ve met many, many more abusive and exploitative antis. it’s simply not possible. do you think i’m surprised you’re full of shit and stubbornly remain that way?

- if you refuse to see/observe for the power differentials and existing sites of violence and trauma and oppression in situations then that is a problem with you, not a problem with us. if you can’t recognize how much you’re hurting people that is a you problem. fix it or fuck off.

- i already exist under a great deal of stalking and surveillance and lack of autonomy, inability to tell my own story and be listened to for myself. others have already tried to misuse and misrepresent and misinterpret my work. do you think you’re unique here?

- fuck prostasia, fuck msc, fuck virped, fuck all the liberals in the community who gain power at our expense and trample over us.

- remember 2021? i do. the axe forgets, the tree remembers.

- prostasia has an organizational csa apologia problem. you think you have the moral high ground?

- burn down the psych ward, keep your assimilationism and judgment out of our communities. keep your abusive prescriptions out of our communities. destroy the psychiatric-industrial complex, institutional privilege, and its stranglehold on discussions and validation of mapness.

- do your own emotional labor. do your own damn research.

- abolish the nonprofit-industrial complex; everything formally hooked up to capital/state is complicit in oppression

- stop blaming us for everything, for fuck’s sake. not everything is a fucking conspiracy. i say this as someone who is sometimes psychotic/delusional/paranoid. the prevalence of map terminology and symbology among actual predators is the fault of antimaps too. there is a complex interaction between the perception of mapness as predatory and the choices of predators and trolls to adopt it, propaganda from antis, and so on. it’s obvious to anyone with sufficient lived experience.

- no such thing as “recovering” from a paraphilia. also no such thing as recovering from perpetrating abuse or from holding an ideology. not everything is a disease, ffs.

- this isn’t about some sort of learning curve from you personally where you get to profit off our issues or have your own arc through us and our struggles like you’re the main character. it isn’t just about changing your opinion or learning more information. you hurt people. you are hurting people. acknowledge that instead of just papering over it.